NEA Grants Explained.

While some have suggested that nature-loving Henry David Thoreau would be appalled to see the National Endowment for the Arts slash its funding for PBS series including "Great Performances" and "American Masters" in favor of the development of a video game which "simulates the environment and geography" of Walden Wood, others have heralded the bi-partisan composition of the NEA funding committee, which included 21-year-old Chet Haze, the Northwestern student/rapper son of actor Tom Hanks, and Alabama Republican Senator Jeff Sessions.  The two were in complete agreement over the new allocations.

As for Great Performances opera, for example, they both summarized their feelings in one word: BORING.  Ballet and modern dance were also deemed BORING.  "Maybe if they did krumping," Haze pointed out, while Sessions suggested "a good twist competition would be nice."  When shown the list of groundbreaking writers, artists, scientists and others profiled on "American Masters," Haze suggested they "couldn't be all that important" since his father wasn't on the list, and Sessions noted, "I'm sure at least half those people were Communists."

Both dismissed the suggestion that the Walden game might run counter to Thoreau's advocacy of actual contact with nature.  "I bet this Thoreau guy, whoever he was, nowadays wouldn't want to hang around where you can't get cell reception," Haze said, while Sessions said, "I think this is a great idea.  We could make 3D game versions out of all of our national parks to preserve them for the public's enjoyment, then sell off the parks to pay down the national debt.  This is the kind of thinking we need more of in this country." 

Both expressed approval for the grant given to a writing program encouraging the composition of poetry through texting.  "Like when profs want you not to check your texts for like a whole fifty minutes, dude, that is so not cool," Haze said.  "Now I can get extra credit for rapping in class."  Sessions noted that the program should benefit the telecom industry, "important job creators."

NEA Spokesman opts
for "innovative and
youth-oriented" approach
in announcing PBS cuts.

Here's an NYTimes summary of who got and who didn't in the NEA grant-process.  http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/26/arts/federal-arts-endowment-sharply-cuts-pbs-grants.html