National Weather Service assumes responsibility for issuing spoiler alerts.

She's a he.

"Somebody had to do it," said an unnamed official at the agency.  "You've got people out there innocently scrolling the web, somebody forgets to add the spoiler alert, and bam! the movie, book, whatever, is completely ruined for unwarned."

Seriously, the New York Times Resident Per-fesser Stanley Fish recently wrote a column about "The Hunger Games" which included plot details without the requisite "spoiler alert" and was so roundly condemned by spoilees that he wrote a column in defense of spoiling.  http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/category/stanley-fish/ Why Stanley Fish is writing about "The Hunger Games" or the people who bother to read Stanley Fish would also be disturbed by a plot revelation, well, that is a mystery that...SPOILER ALERT...I can't solve.

But what I can do is ruin somebody else's day by offering a few spoilers of my own.

She's a he.

1.  Norman Bates' mother is really Norman Bates in a dress and wig.  Yeah, I know.  He sure looked like an old lady.

2.  Darth Vader is really Luke Skywalker's dad, and Luke is really Princess Leia's brother.  Yeah, I know.  He sure seemed evil.

3.  The chick in Crying Game?  She is really a dude.  Yeah, I know.  She sure rocked those earrings.

4.  You know that guy in the Oval Office?  Barack Obama?  He was born in the United States.  Yeah, I know I fooled you, cause it's a different kind of plot spoiler altogether.  And I'm ruining it for the dozen other states that wanted to get in line behind Arizona and go through this stupid story one more time.  But they'll get over it.  Or maybe they won't.  http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/OTUS/birthers-real/story?id=16425991